Twenty 23 Three

23 years ago???? I had a different last name. My toddler son wondered why mine wasn’t the same as his and Daddy’s.

A fancy wedding could wait…. besides we were already a family!

We married on a Wednesday in May. A practical day! He was off work and I was between finals and summer classes.

So young, no manual, no model, and no real plan just a dream of a future, intense affection and devotion to our youngest son! Could we even really know what marriage required? Did we truly grasp what it meant to, love and cherish to death do you part?

I thought a husband was like………. “Cliff Huxtable” ( the character Y’all). Charming, witty, doting, never angered, just happy go lucky!!!

I mean he had a wife and 4.5 beautiful children. (My pre-teen fantasy was to be their daughter Vanessa but that’s a whole-nother blog post)!

I wanted to be his Clair …… charming, seductive, intelligent, beautiful …………………… PERFECT!!!

Of course too young to have the wisdom, experience, comfort in my own skin I was willfully unprepared. I couldn’t be his Clair!

He, Lacking the same, not yet knowing his place in this world, his gifts, his calling nor his blessings……He couldn’t be my Cliff

That’s a good thing! They were fictional characters, but when you grow up with few models for loving, committed and faithful marriage. It was easy to know what you didn’t want.

Marriage was like a jagged cliff one false step and it would all come tumbling down. It almost did!! Baby #2 didn’t make it easier but he brought a new piece of love to the table. So did #3 and #4.

I still look back and wonder how we got to this place of joy, love, two grown children and two teens, commitment, shared values and shared ministry. Yes, passion and the desire to Love Deeply can carry you a long way.

BUT GOD……….. Cliche as it may sound. I can’t deny how including Him in our marriage changed the trajectory!

Day by Day, Year by Year: